AFC 2013 Predictions
Whats up people its your favorite bearded gentleman. If you are like me around this time of the year you tend to get happy. No not because Thanksgiving and Christmas cooking is around the corner (those are still some good reasons to be happy), but because the new football season is about to start.(I don't count pre season as the season starting since it doesn't count towards nothing.)
I'm not one to break down teams and give predictions. But the homie @KATACLYSMIC13 did. I'm only focus if Jerry Jones is going to stop trying to be a coach and be a owner. But that's I different story for another day.
Here is @KATACLYSMIC13 AFC predictions for the 2013 football season.
AFC EAST
Patriots: 9-7
Bills: 10-6
Jets: 7-9
Dolphins: 6-10
The AFC East will be mildly competitive. The Patriots WILL take a step back. Brady is good, but not a miracle worker. Lack of weapons, Starting the season with no Gronk, no Kill…Oops I mean Hernandez, and no Welker one of the few players to have 1,000 catches and 2 touchdowns (moving the chains). Unless Bellicheat (damn autocorrect) Bilichick is taping again to help that defense their window may get shut this year. The Jets will have a good defense. Rex Ryan is taking over again, make no mistake Rex Ryan is the best defensive mind in the game today. Don’t let the crazy talk fool you, but that offense is Terrible. Geno will get on the field, but who the hell is he throwing to. The jets only legitimate option is running every play. The Dolphins will disappoint. All that money for nothing, I simply don’t see them being any different from last year. They may steal a few wins, but this is not basketball. In football you have to build a team, not buy one. My surprise team of the year is the Buffalo Bills. “No one circles the wagons like the Buffalo Bills” (damnit I hate Chris Berman). EJ Manual was the surprise pick and his play is surprising as HELL. The Bills have SPEED everywhere and if there is two things that will always hold true 1) You cannot teach speed and 2) Speed KILLS. Look for the defense to improve. I’m excited to watch the Bills circle those damn wagons. F*%K YOU Berman!!!
AFC WEST
Broncos: 12-4
Chiefs: 8-8
Chargers: 5-11
Raiders: 4-12
The Broncos will repeat their dominance from last year. The addition of “Mr. Move the Chains” Welker and the appearance of a commitment to the run game I think the Broncos will be able to win games even without Von Miller. Plus they beefed up their secondary which is the reason the Ravens won the SuperBowl. The Chiefs have Alex Smith as their QB. Alex Smith is the model for efficiency. He is at his best throwing 20-22 passes with a strong running game behind him. Hello Andy Reid, who like his QB’s to throw between 65-100 passes a game and LOVES to ignore his run game even when they average 6yrds a carry. Sorry Jamaal. The Chiefs defense will make up for Reid’s terrible coaching and this team will be .500. The Chargers drafted Te’o, Te’o plays middle linebacker, Te’o has yet to record a tackle in preseason. How is that possible? Also has Phillip Rivers gone pure Jay Cutler. He looks like he gives zero Fcuks about whats going on during the game. By the way I love Jay Cutler. Raiders…Next year you will be 60mil under the cap. You have one more year of suffering under AL Davis’ contracts, but there is hope. This year will be ugly, I’m seeing a perfect marriage between Clowney and the Black Hole. With 60mil to fill in the other 21 positions. So yeah, There's that.
AFC SOUTH
Texans: 10-6
Colts: 10-6
Titans: 7-9
Jaguars: 3-13
IF, IF, and damnit I mean IF, Arian Foster can stay healthy the Texans can be a very good team. Offensively and Defensively they are stacked. They have real weapons on both side of the ball. Schuab don Fuck it up. The second coming of Peyton Manning is here, but this one can run and has something the Peyton never had…LUCK. I mean really did you see that play against the Giants in week 2 of the preseason. Luck throw a pass that should have been picked, LUCKily the defender swatted the pass in the endzone, where Reggie Wayne found the ball and the LUCKiest catch in preseason. The Colts will take over the world one day with skill and LUCK. The Titans will be a middle of the road team. They will be Okay on defense, bad at passing, and great at running the ball which equals Okay on offense. The Jags…umm…yeah.
AFC NORTH
Bengals: 11-5
Steelers: 9-7
Ravens: 9-7
Browns: 7-9
The team I like the best in the AFC is the Bengals, because I said that I think we can be confident the Bungles will make a return. But jokes aside the Bengals have a good defense, they can run the ball, and have a great young wide receiver QB duo in AJ Green (best young receiver in the league) and Andy “Red Head” Dalton. This team can go far, but I need someone explain to me WHY THE HELL MIKE ZIMMER HASN’T HAD A HEAD COACHING GIG. (breath)I needed to get that out of my system. The Steelers will be the Steelers…Gritty, Mean, Ugly. Also unable to block for Ben. I put less than 10% stock in preseason, but damn. No qb should get hit that much in a game that doesn't count. I’ve watched both Steelers preseason games he was sacked 20 times in both, AND he only took 15 snaps. The Ravens will be better on defense (can’t believe I just said that), but their offense will be worse, much worse. Shocker of the year the Browns will win seven games. The 30 year old second year QB Weeden will give the city of Cleveland hope, but then their owner will be arrested and convicted for ripping off customers in his trucking business, have to sell the team, and the new regime will blow up the team and the Browns will again be the hopeless Browns.
I'm not one to break down teams and give predictions. But the homie @KATACLYSMIC13 did. I'm only focus if Jerry Jones is going to stop trying to be a coach and be a owner. But that's I different story for another day.
Here is @KATACLYSMIC13 AFC predictions for the 2013 football season.
AFC EASTPatriots: 9-7
Bills: 10-6
Jets: 7-9
Dolphins: 6-10
The AFC East will be mildly competitive. The Patriots WILL take a step back. Brady is good, but not a miracle worker. Lack of weapons, Starting the season with no Gronk, no Kill…Oops I mean Hernandez, and no Welker one of the few players to have 1,000 catches and 2 touchdowns (moving the chains). Unless Bellicheat (damn autocorrect) Bilichick is taping again to help that defense their window may get shut this year. The Jets will have a good defense. Rex Ryan is taking over again, make no mistake Rex Ryan is the best defensive mind in the game today. Don’t let the crazy talk fool you, but that offense is Terrible. Geno will get on the field, but who the hell is he throwing to. The jets only legitimate option is running every play. The Dolphins will disappoint. All that money for nothing, I simply don’t see them being any different from last year. They may steal a few wins, but this is not basketball. In football you have to build a team, not buy one. My surprise team of the year is the Buffalo Bills. “No one circles the wagons like the Buffalo Bills” (damnit I hate Chris Berman). EJ Manual was the surprise pick and his play is surprising as HELL. The Bills have SPEED everywhere and if there is two things that will always hold true 1) You cannot teach speed and 2) Speed KILLS. Look for the defense to improve. I’m excited to watch the Bills circle those damn wagons. F*%K YOU Berman!!!
AFC WEST
Broncos: 12-4
Chiefs: 8-8
Chargers: 5-11
Raiders: 4-12
The Broncos will repeat their dominance from last year. The addition of “Mr. Move the Chains” Welker and the appearance of a commitment to the run game I think the Broncos will be able to win games even without Von Miller. Plus they beefed up their secondary which is the reason the Ravens won the SuperBowl. The Chiefs have Alex Smith as their QB. Alex Smith is the model for efficiency. He is at his best throwing 20-22 passes with a strong running game behind him. Hello Andy Reid, who like his QB’s to throw between 65-100 passes a game and LOVES to ignore his run game even when they average 6yrds a carry. Sorry Jamaal. The Chiefs defense will make up for Reid’s terrible coaching and this team will be .500. The Chargers drafted Te’o, Te’o plays middle linebacker, Te’o has yet to record a tackle in preseason. How is that possible? Also has Phillip Rivers gone pure Jay Cutler. He looks like he gives zero Fcuks about whats going on during the game. By the way I love Jay Cutler. Raiders…Next year you will be 60mil under the cap. You have one more year of suffering under AL Davis’ contracts, but there is hope. This year will be ugly, I’m seeing a perfect marriage between Clowney and the Black Hole. With 60mil to fill in the other 21 positions. So yeah, There's that.
AFC SOUTH Texans: 10-6
Colts: 10-6
Titans: 7-9
Jaguars: 3-13
IF, IF, and damnit I mean IF, Arian Foster can stay healthy the Texans can be a very good team. Offensively and Defensively they are stacked. They have real weapons on both side of the ball. Schuab don Fuck it up. The second coming of Peyton Manning is here, but this one can run and has something the Peyton never had…LUCK. I mean really did you see that play against the Giants in week 2 of the preseason. Luck throw a pass that should have been picked, LUCKily the defender swatted the pass in the endzone, where Reggie Wayne found the ball and the LUCKiest catch in preseason. The Colts will take over the world one day with skill and LUCK. The Titans will be a middle of the road team. They will be Okay on defense, bad at passing, and great at running the ball which equals Okay on offense. The Jags…umm…yeah.
AFC NORTH Bengals: 11-5
Steelers: 9-7
Ravens: 9-7
Browns: 7-9
The team I like the best in the AFC is the Bengals, because I said that I think we can be confident the Bungles will make a return. But jokes aside the Bengals have a good defense, they can run the ball, and have a great young wide receiver QB duo in AJ Green (best young receiver in the league) and Andy “Red Head” Dalton. This team can go far, but I need someone explain to me WHY THE HELL MIKE ZIMMER HASN’T HAD A HEAD COACHING GIG. (breath)I needed to get that out of my system. The Steelers will be the Steelers…Gritty, Mean, Ugly. Also unable to block for Ben. I put less than 10% stock in preseason, but damn. No qb should get hit that much in a game that doesn't count. I’ve watched both Steelers preseason games he was sacked 20 times in both, AND he only took 15 snaps. The Ravens will be better on defense (can’t believe I just said that), but their offense will be worse, much worse. Shocker of the year the Browns will win seven games. The 30 year old second year QB Weeden will give the city of Cleveland hope, but then their owner will be arrested and convicted for ripping off customers in his trucking business, have to sell the team, and the new regime will blow up the team and the Browns will again be the hopeless Browns.
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